"For a piece of dried fish I had made an irrevocable failure" (Chapter 4).
Rodrigues knows he has screwed up. No doubts about his failures have been made. He recreated a biblical story of Jacob and Esau, giving up his pride and distrust for a sliver of food and temporary happiness. Whether his choice was redeemed or not will later be revealed, but for now Kichijiro is still just as bad of a Christian as he was when he was first introduced, and Rodrigues no longer knows if his faith is strong enough to outlast the next night of torture and starvation.
Rodrigues is painting a picture of selfish intent. He is trying to remain the hero, yet continues to fail in small areas, like with this dried fish. Kichijiro gained his trust for a split second, now forgiveness is out of the question. He exchanged his religion for what is now even more worthless than a dry fish that sparks thirst. However, still the fish leads to thirst, still the minor satisfaction deprives the human of enough to go searching for what's real. Rodrigues needed a metaphorical dry fish (the silence of God) in order to thirst enough to find a solution to it. Sitting in the prison cell he hears God, maybe only once and maybe it doesn't satisfy his broken spirit and parched soul, but he gets a little water, a little hope.
"Lord, why are you silent? Why are you always silent...?" (Chapter 5).
Beyond that, after being captured, Rodrigues is faced with Inoue's startlingly gentle and kind facade. He sees a man that seems patient and kind among the men who are deciding his fate and judging his words and actions. Rodrigues believes enough to have an inch of hope about Inoue and his kind nature. Rodrigues himself, upon finding out that the man smiling at him was the evil one he had been warned of, still doubted that so much evil could come out of a kind face, stating that Inoue was a "seemingly good, meek man" (Chapter 6). Maybe this is simply because of Rodrigues's obsession with the faces of men and Jesus. No matter, looks can be deceiving and sometimes the piece of dried fish, the doubting of the existence of a divine and caring Creator, seems worth the risk for a minute of satisfaction from the attack on one's own soul and mind.
Rodrigues wraps it all up nicely when he makes this astute observation about the nature of humanity:
"Anyone could be attracted by the beautiful and the charming. But could such attraction be called love? True love was to accept humanity when wasted like rags and tatters" (Chapter 6).
Comments: AnnaKate & Abbie
Rodrigues knows he has screwed up. No doubts about his failures have been made. He recreated a biblical story of Jacob and Esau, giving up his pride and distrust for a sliver of food and temporary happiness. Whether his choice was redeemed or not will later be revealed, but for now Kichijiro is still just as bad of a Christian as he was when he was first introduced, and Rodrigues no longer knows if his faith is strong enough to outlast the next night of torture and starvation.
Rodrigues is painting a picture of selfish intent. He is trying to remain the hero, yet continues to fail in small areas, like with this dried fish. Kichijiro gained his trust for a split second, now forgiveness is out of the question. He exchanged his religion for what is now even more worthless than a dry fish that sparks thirst. However, still the fish leads to thirst, still the minor satisfaction deprives the human of enough to go searching for what's real. Rodrigues needed a metaphorical dry fish (the silence of God) in order to thirst enough to find a solution to it. Sitting in the prison cell he hears God, maybe only once and maybe it doesn't satisfy his broken spirit and parched soul, but he gets a little water, a little hope.
"Lord, why are you silent? Why are you always silent...?" (Chapter 5).
Beyond that, after being captured, Rodrigues is faced with Inoue's startlingly gentle and kind facade. He sees a man that seems patient and kind among the men who are deciding his fate and judging his words and actions. Rodrigues believes enough to have an inch of hope about Inoue and his kind nature. Rodrigues himself, upon finding out that the man smiling at him was the evil one he had been warned of, still doubted that so much evil could come out of a kind face, stating that Inoue was a "seemingly good, meek man" (Chapter 6). Maybe this is simply because of Rodrigues's obsession with the faces of men and Jesus. No matter, looks can be deceiving and sometimes the piece of dried fish, the doubting of the existence of a divine and caring Creator, seems worth the risk for a minute of satisfaction from the attack on one's own soul and mind.
Rodrigues wraps it all up nicely when he makes this astute observation about the nature of humanity:
"Anyone could be attracted by the beautiful and the charming. But could such attraction be called love? True love was to accept humanity when wasted like rags and tatters" (Chapter 6).
Comments: AnnaKate & Abbie
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